YouTube MeTube

Just posted a home video of my friend SP enjoying himself. No its not what you are thinking. To satisfy your curiosity, check out my YouTube site here:

www.youtube.com/carlshinoda

Hope this will be the start of my movie career. (that sounded ambitious). Well to be precise, a movie clip career. Hmmm.. not even a career but perhaps a pastime. Just for the fun of it. Here.. have a taste of what's big to come and I don't mean my chub pal on the video.

I am casting for my next horror movie. 5 minutes of fame, anyone?

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Thank you Mr. Edison

In these days and age, power is almost everything. I realised that last night when my fusebox tripped on me. For one brow-sweating moment I saw myself tossing and turning in bed with no air-condition to sooth my tired body. Didn't cross my mind to snap back on the fusebox, I proceed to grope my way to find a torch. Guided my way to open up some windows to let in the natural air. Then I decided to wait out the dimly illuminated blackout with some of my usual nightly hobbies. Then horror struck!!!

Oh My Goat!
I Can't switch on air-con
Can't update my blog.
Can't send emails!
Can't even get into the net.
Can't watch DVD movies
Can't switch on the TV
Can't get my water heater running.
Can't race down the virtual street with my PS2 joystick
Can't play my CDs
Can't even break the night's silence with radio music
Thank God for iPod. Oh shoot! Not recharged. I can't recharge my iPod!

Whamaigonnado?

Oh wait, the mobile phone still lights up. Claimed to have loaded features. Time to get to know my mobile toy. I will never survive ice-age! What am I gonna do without power. Thank you Mr. Edison.

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Age Old Question.

By Mid-August I will be hitting the big Five Oh. Have I been roaming this earth for nearly 50 years already?. Damn! I feel like a dinosaur. When I was in my 20s, anyone who claims that they are in their 50s, my first reaction would be.. hmm that's ancient. Now that I've been jolted out of my fountain of youth, it's a bit like stumbling accidently into the Senior Citizen Zone. I sure am not prepared for this. Its not as if I want to prepare for it anyway. No, I didnt get up one morning and decide to change my entire wardrobe to a Ho Chin Minh collection. Nor would I be popping a denture into my mouth any time soon. I still go about surfing Billboard Hot 100 to check what's cool in the chart and proceed to the local music CD store. Yeah I know, the young dude with the spikey hair behind the store counter must be thinking 'daddy looking for his kid's birthday gift'. Sorry dude, the gift's for this old kid. Me.

I just dont feel my age. No let me rephrase that...I am SO NOT feeling my age. But am I trying to be cool, talking the MTV talk living in a state of denial? A little torn between here. Is this what mid-life crisis is all about? Feeling my age or not feeling my age? Damn. Lets see where I stand.

Feeling my age:
1. when the sales promoter pushed 'Uncle, you will see result in two weeks with this age spots cream'
2. when the government remindered me that I am eligible to collect a portion of my retirement fund.
3. when the insurance agent didnt bother to turn up after the second appointment
4. when my doctor nagged me into doing brisk walking or Tai Chi
5. when I consciously reduce my fizzy beverage consumption

So NOT feeling my age:
1. when I vibrate my hands occasionally with my PS2
2. when my CD collection includes Beyonce and Black Eyed Peas
3. when I watch American Idol.
4. when I stick iPod to both sides of my head.
5. when I don't dislike fastfood.
6. when text messaging while driving. don't try this at home. Huh?
7. when changing TV channels like I am text messaging.
8. when I still google at cute Manggas! My friends will know this one.
9. when I hangout with friends in their 20s
10. when I start blogging

Ten over five ain't bad. Ok, I am so NOT feeling my age.

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How Out Am I?

At 50 and single, there's always this inescapable question. Usually coming from tackless nosey oldies at wedding dinners. While admiring the young grooms, they would turn to me and said 'When will you be next?' That's right. The big Q that has all the hooks to fish out more sordid details out of my protected sexuality. Imagine returning the big Q to these nosey oldies during funeral receptions. When will you be next? kekeke! The devil in me. Of course when it comes down to it, there are a list of excuses (oh how i hated myself) to satisfy their curiosity. Rambling inaudibly...
1. My girlfriend just dumped me
2. I hate kids
3. I am married to my job.
4. I am not into sticking to one yet.
5. I have been heartbroken too many times.
6. Don't want to be tied down.

That was then. Even in my 30s. But who am I kidding. These days I will just have to tell them why I didnt get married.

I AM FREAKING HAPPY WITH MY GAY LIFE!!!

Yeah. Loud, out and proud. But is it? Perhaps not so loud. As I am writing this, a few disapproving faces flash across my mind already. But do I care? Lets see how out am I.

My eldest sister (and I mean real sister) she kinda know. Didnt really have to discuss with her.
My second sister, she knows and even brought her to some gay clubs.
My colleaques. most know. Didnt really need to discuss with them.
My Lover. He knows. He better!
My best friends. 2 of them. They certainly know.
My Brother-In-law. I dont care too much.
My clients. If they ask. I tell.
My neighbour, out himself to me.
In public. No they can't tell. I am not flaunting either.

Hmmm.. guess I am as out as a fish out of water!

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